I’m never one to keep secrets from my family. They know everything that goes on with my life and I like to keep it that way. I enjoy and love our closeness and there’s nothing I would change about it. Because of that, whenever I am faced with a problem, they know about it. Whenever I feel agitated, they know about it. Whenever I feel down and upset, and whenever there is something wrong and/or amazing going on with my life, they know about it. I never keep secrets from them because I know they know who I am and they accept me for it–even my imperfections. That’s the great thing about families, and I am thankful that God gave me one of the best ones there are.
So, anyways, they know what goes on with my life and they know how recently something’s been bothering me. So, my mom gave me this little book that my Aunt gave her and my dad. She told me to read it. And, I did. I followed her advice.
The title of the book is “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…And It’s All Small Stuff” (I know, the title is a mouthful) and it is written by one Richard Carlson. It’s a good book and I would want to share something that I have read from said book. It’s the second chapter and it is entitled, Make Peace With Imperfection. Quoted below is what Richard Carlson has to say about that.
I’ve yet to meet an absolute perfectionist whose life was filled with inner peace. The need for perfection and the desire for inner tranquility conflict with each other. Whenever we are attached to having something a certain way, better than it already is, we are, almost by definition, engaged in a losing battle. Rather than being content and grateful for what we have, we are focused on what’s wrong with something and our need to fix it. When we are zeroed in on what’s wrong, it implies that we are dissatisfied, discontent.
Whether it is related to ourselves–a disorganized closet, a scratch on the car, an imperfect accomplishment, a few pounds we would like to lose–or someone else’s “imperfections”–the way someone looks, behaves, or lives their life–the very act of focusing on imperfection pulls us away from our goal of being kind and gentle. This strategy has nothing to do with ceasing to do your very best but with being overly attached and focused on what’s wrong with life. It’s about realizing that while there’s always a better way to do something, this doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy and appreciate the way things already are.
The solution here is to catch yourself when you fall into your habit of insisting that things should be other than they are. Gently remind yourself that life is okay the way it is, right now. In the absence of judgement, everything would be fine. As you begin to eliminate your need for perfection in all areas of your life, you’ll begin to discover the perfection in life itself.
I really like how he puts it because, let’s face it, there are people out there who would only look at the bad side of things and would control every, single, damn thing to their liking. They want it to be the way they want it without thinking about anything else and they don’t just ruin their own lives by worrying about making everything perfect, they are ruining others, too.
I posted a quote once. It said: “I am not perfect, but I’m perfect in my imperfection. I am perfectly imperfect.” I like that quote because it rings true for every one of us. It’s just that sometimes we forget it and we make a big deal about trying to be perfect. But, that’s not what should matter. It shouldn’t matter because no matter what we do, we won’t ever be perfect. There would always be someone who would try to find a flaw in us. What should matter is not minding these people and, instead, giving our very best in all we do.